"What's for Dinner?" A Mother's Reflection on Modern Motherhood
"What's for dinner?” It's a simple question that’s echoed through my home for years, but its meaning has evolved alongside my journey in motherhood. As my kids have grown into their twenties, this once straightforward query has taken on new layers, embodying the shift from "doing" to "being" in my role as a mother.
In the early days, "What's for dinner?" meant I had to think on my feet, conjuring up something nutritious that my kids would actually eat without too much fuss. Those days were a blur of shuffling from one activity to the next, often rushing to grab a quick bite in the car before heading home to tackle homework and prepare for the next day. It was non-stop, and dinner was often an afterthought—whatever was quick and easy, usually pasta or takeout.
My identity as a mother was defined by all the tasks I performed daily—packing lunches, organizing playdates, helping with homework, and ensuring everyone got to bed on time. I was always doing something.
As my kids transitioned into their twenties, my role as a mother shifted dramatically. I no longer had to manage their schedules or remind them to do their homework. Instead, my involvement became more nuanced. They sought advice about career moves, shared their latest Netflix obsessions, and called for a quick recipe tip before hosting their own dinner parties.
"What's for dinner?" became less about just eating and more about an opportunity to connect over shared moments. Whether we were discussing new restaurants to try or exploring the latest trends in cooking, the kitchen evolved from a place of feeding to a place of bonding.
Motherhood in this new chapter is also filled with moments of humor and contradiction. My son, who can create a digital platform during the day, still texts me for advice on what to wear. My daughter, who loves to travel the world, still prefers me to drive her places when she’s home.
And despite being adults, they still bring their laundry home when they visit, and no matter how many times I explain it, the concept of putting dishes in the dishwasher remains elusive.
In this new phase of motherhood, I've realized the importance of moving from "doing" to "being." I've learned to be present in ways that honor their independence while reinforcing the unwavering support system that family represents. I'm not just their caretaker; I'm their guide, confidante, and cheerleader. It’s a relationship that requires listening more and directing less, offering advice only when asked.
This intentional approach to motherhood has allowed me to strengthen my relationship with my children. By being present, I've found that "What's for dinner?" isn't just about food but about the opportunity to share laughter, life updates, and the joys and challenges of adulthood.
I’m no longer the mother who oversees every detail of their lives, but rather the mother who listens deeply and celebrates the little victories along the way.
As I reflect on this journey of modern motherhood, I realize that "What's for dinner?" has become a metaphor for the evolving relationship between my children and me. It symbolizes the beauty of being able to transition from doing everything to simply being present. It's an invitation to laugh, to love, and to cherish the moments that make motherhood so incredibly rewarding.
Here’s to all the mothers navigating this wonderfully complex phase of life. May your hearts be full, your kitchens warm, and your family dinners always sprinkled with laughter.